All of us had parents. And if we are lucky enough, those parents will still be alive when we get to the stage where we start with a family ourselves one day. Should your parents be living with you while you are trying to raise a family, it could unfortunately also be the source of conflict and unhappiness.

There are many advantages of grandma and grandpa living with their children. In the first place, the grandchildren won’t be alone at home the whole day. Secondly there will always be someone at home, which obviously is better for security reasons. Grandpas and grandmas normally love gardening, so there will always be someone to water the garden.

A large number of the problems experienced by children in this regard is because of grandparents interfering with the way they raise their children. Many couple also realize too late that they suddenly have no privacy any more. That is the reason why you should seriously think of making a very good long term investment: build a separate granny flat on the premises for your parents where they can continue with their own lives.

One very important aspect to remember is that the granny flat should have its own kitchen, where your mother can cook for her and your father. Make sure it’s fully fitted with all the necessary conveniences. When choosing an oven, buy a good quality one that can last for the rest of their lives. A delonghi oven will always be a good choice.

Also make sure that the flat is easily accessible. When you are young and healthy, you tend to forget that your father suffers from leg arthritis and find it difficult to climb stairs, for example. A ramp for wheelchair access is a good idea, even though they might both still be healthy at the moment.

Make sure you allow your mother and father enough quality time with their grandchildren. A few compromises might be necessary in this regard. A good idea is to sometimes take the baby bath to your parent’s apartment when it’s time to bath the baby and let grandma assist with the process. She will appreciate it more than you ever know and it will take her back to her own days of motherhood for a few minutes.

Sometimes your parents will want to go with when you take a drive and you want to be alone with your partner and the children. Refusing to take them along on such an occasion will do harm to your relationship and make them feel unwanted. A solution is to have regular family days where both grandpa and grandma go along to spend quality time with their children and grandchildren.

You should never forget that you will also get old - much sooner than you ever dream it will happen. The example you set for your own children now, will eventually determine how they are going to treat you when you become old. Maybe it’s a form of karma, but treating your parents badly when they are old has a way of backfiring in a nasty way…